Looking to enjoy lifes little submissive treasures!!! ______________________________________ Remember... you're only here on earth for limited duration, so live it up!!! ______________________________________ I will have a relationship with one that knows herself to be a within, a desire to learn by design and mindful of the BDSM lifestyle. Willing to learn what true unity is. Kink and fetish are not my motivators, though they are certainly part of the picture... a Slave, who will be my canvas while I mold & teach. She will know that I love her dearly and will return that depth of feeling. She will have no more choice in this than I do. She will be in my power and I in hers. She will be as devoted to me as I am to her. She will trust in my loyalty and my judgement. She will feel safe in my presence and still feel my protection in my absence. She will share her problems with me. Not in an attempt to have me take them off her shoulders but as a pupil sharing with a tutor. She will take as much joy in learning from me as I take in teaching. She will recognise that the physical manifestation of my need for her will take the form of sex; but she will know that it is her I need rather than the sex. She will know that our erotic explorations are simply explorations of each other. ______________________________________ ~ She will see my need for her at the most inappropriate times and revel in the warmth of that; knowing as she does that I would do nothing to damage her standing with friends, family or colleagues. She will find it as exciting to be always available to my lust as I do in knowing it to be so. She will take so much pleasure in my need that it will be her constant preoccupation to inspire even more need. She will find the joy of my response to her imaginative stimulation enthralling. She will be totally open with me and neither hide or filter any thoughts, feelings, responses or actions from me. She will do so, safe in the knowledge that while I can be assured of her candour, I will never judge her. ______________________________________ ~ Only those thoughts and actions that she tries not to share will be considered transgressions. She will know and understand that outside of those activities that I have specifically directed her in, she has total freedom and will exercise that freedom with alacrity, never suppressing any desire or impulse. She will know that this license in no way reduces her right to exclusive access to my heart and desire. Though sometimes coloured by fear, her eagerness to see how I intend to stretch her limits once more, will know no bounds. Her anticipation will be liquid and speed her back to our home. For all her obedience and devotion she will be demanding. I will feel challenged to satisfy all her needs and she will recognise the achievement when it is done. ______________________________________ ~ She will know that no other could satisfy her so. Though, mischievously, she will identify anyone that has the appearance of being able to and taunt me with how eager she is to make them to attempt to do so. She will never mistake sensitivity and caring for weakness. ______________________________________ I will add more to my description as i feel it is suitable.

My Ideal Person The Nine Degrees Of Submission

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Which one are you?
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The outright non-submissive masochist or kinky sensualist
Not into servitude, humiliation or giving up of control; just pain and/or spiced-up sensuality, on the masochist's own terms for the masochist's own pleasure (ie: being turned on solely or mainly by one's own bodily sensations, rather than being turned on by being "used" to gratify one's partner's sadism).

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Pseudo-submissive non-slave
Not into even playing "slave", but into other "submissive" role-playing, e.g.: schoolteacher scenes, infantilism, "forced" transvestism. Usually into humiliation, but NOT into servitude, even in play. Dictates the scene to a large degree.

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Pseudo-submissive PLAY slave
Likes to play at being slave. Likes to *feel* subservient; may in some cases like to *feel* that one is being "used" to gratify one's partner's sadism; and may even really serve the dominant in some ways, but only on the "slave's" own terms. Dictates the scene to a large degree; often fetishistic (e.g. foot worshippers).

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True submissive non-slave
Really gives up control (though only temporarily and within agreed upon limits), but gets his/her main satisfaction from aspects of submission *other than* serving or being used by the dominant. Usually turned on by suspense, vulnerability, and/or giving up of responsibility. Doesn't dictate the scene except in very general terms, but still seeks mainly her/his own *direct* pleasure (rather than getting one's pleasure mainly from pleasing the dominant).

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True submissive PLAY slave
Really gives up control (though only temporarily; only during brief "scenes" and within limits) and gets his/her main satisfaction from serving and being used by the dominant - but only for FUN purposes, usually erotic. (May or may not be into pain, but if so, is turned on by pain *indirectly*, ie: enjoys being the objects of one's partner's sadism, on which the submissive places few requirements or restrictions.)

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Uncommitted short-term but more-than-play semi-slave
Really gives up control (though usually within limits); wants to serve and be used by the dominant; wants to provide practical/non-erotic as well as fun/ erotic services; but only when the "slave" is in the mood. May even act as a full-time slave for, say, several days at a time, but is free to quit at any time (or at the end of the agreed upon several days). May or may not have a long-term relationship with one's Mistress/Master, but, either way, the "slave" has the final say over when he or she will serve.

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Part-time consensual but REAL slave
Has ongoing commitment to an owner/slave relationship, and regards oneself as the Mistress'/Master's "property" at all times. Wants to obey and please her/him in all aspects of life - practical/non-erotic as well as fun/erotic. Devotes most of one's time to other commitments (eg: job) but the Mistress/Master has first pick of the slave's free time.

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Full-time live-in consensual slave
Within no more than a few broad limits/requirements, the slave regards herself/ himself as existing solely for the Mistress'/Master's use, pleasure and well- being. The slave in turn expects to be regarded as a prized possession. Not much different from the situation of the traditional housewife, except that within the S/M world the slave's position is more likely to be fully consensual, especially if the slave is male (since men certainly aren't socially pressured into this kind of lifestyle). Within the S/M world, a full-time "slave" arrangement is entered into with an explicit awareness of the magnitude of power that is being given up, and hence is usually entered into much more carefully, with more awareness of the possible dangers, and with much clearer and more specific agreements than usually precede the traditional marriage.

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Consensual total slave with no limits
A common fantasy ideal which probably doesn't exist in real life (except in authoritarian religious cults and other situations where the "consent" is induced by brainwashing and/or social or economic pressures, and hence isn't fully consensual). A few S/M purists will insist that you aren't really a slave unless you're willing to do absolutely *anything* for your Mistress/Master, with no limits at all. There are a few who claim to be no-limits slaves, but in all cases it would be reasonable to doubt the claim.

Cognitive Dissonance Theory:
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The following explains how changing a slave's behavior and resistance to change often collide in training and why a slave changes behavior.

Cognitive dissonance says that "when a slave's attitude conflicts with other personal beliefs or the behavior her Master requires, it causes a mental discomfort (conflict and or resistance). This motivates her to change either her attitude or behavior to reduce dissonance."

A Master controls the slave's behavior therefore her attitude must be changed in order to reduce the mental conflict. she is "helpless" to change her behavior because it is determined by her Master. She has given her Master the "legitimate power" to control her behavior therefore her only option is changing her attitude. However, resistance to the change is to be expected.

The term "helpless" means that she is helpless to change her behavior and still maintain her slavery (upholding the contract with her Master and pleasing him). Yes, she could change her behavior to one that is not what her Master's wishes but that would be outside of her slavery.

Her behavior is determined by her Master and her attitude changes to reflect that behavior, if

1) a Master's "legitimate power" is well established and strong,

2) the slave believes her Master has the skills necessary to train her (expert power), and

3) she has a sense or desires a sense of belonging to her Master (reverent power).

If the above exist, then reward and coercive power can be used to change behavior and overcome resistance.

D/s - In context of relationships and social interactions, this acronym stands for Dominance and submission.

Dominance (also called Domination) - In terms of BDSM and D/s, this term refers to taking control of a person or situation through usage of some means (such as physical, mental, financial, etc), or to exercise this power. A person who exercises this power on a regular basis, outside of BDSM scenes, is called a Dominant; the gender specific titles being Dom for a man, Domme or Dominatrix for a woman.

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submission - In BDSM and D/s, this refers to the act of yielding to something or someone; also refers to the state of submitting. This may be through the manipulation of a Dominant or Top. Typically, someone who submits on a regular basis, outside of a BDSM scene, is referred to as a submissive. Submissives who submit to an extreme degree are called slaves

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Don't stare at a box of orange juice, just because it says 'concentrate."

What are your favorite musicians or bands?:
many list, just ask me.

What types of sexual activities turn you on?:
Giving Oral Sex, Receiving Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Sadomasochism, Toys (Vibrators/Dildos/etc.), Rimming, Fetishes, Light Bondage, Candle Wax, Spanking, Role Playing, Threesomes, Slave/Master, Mutual Masturbation, Making Home "Movies", Participating in Erotic Photography, Handcuffs/Shackles, Breast/Nipple Torture, Clamps, etc., Blindfolds, Leather, Fisting

What factors are most important to you when looking for a sexual partner?:
Sexual experience, Physical attraction, Experience in a certain role (top/bottom; master/slave), Ability to be discreet, Sexual appetite, Willingness to freely discuss and try anything, Agreeable to a commitment free sexual relationship, Creativity/Kinkiness level, A little of each

Have you ever had cybersex?:
I've tried it, but it's just not the same.

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