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Finishing each other's sandwiches  

40Deuce 46M
4633 posts
5/26/2018 7:13 am

Last Read:
5/29/2018 2:36 pm

Finishing each other's sandwiches

A while back I went to pop off a text message to a lady friend of mine and I noticed that before I had even typed anything the predictive text suggestion said "Please Give Head" . Which is strange because I don't send dirty texts . Well one time I did to BigLala but that was a part of gag . Yeah , that's right , I know her IRL , jealous ? [blog BiggLala]

Anyway , I went head and sent it because why wouldn't I - and after I explained the context we had a good laugh because upon receiving that message her phone's suggestion was "Getting In The Car" .

If only it was that easy phone , if only .

And now I present to you a very poignant Batman story written completely by predict text ;

Batman is looking for a secret weapon to use on his birthday . (sure we all get like that on our birthday) He gets involved with gangs and discovers that his is exactly what he wants . (I guess beating up gangs is a pretty good way for Batman to find self-acceptance) Batman learns that he has been abducted from his past and he is merely a series of stories related to justice . (oh shit , this is like some 4th wall action right here ! )

Batman isn't paid to destroy crime corners . (true he's doing this pro-bono) He is actually attracted to crimes and also the Penguin . (whoa , plot twist ! )
The Penguin begins to fall in love with guns and gangs all over Gotham . Batman is destroyed . Batman must join the Penguin . He loves him a criminal . (don't we all , amiright ladies ? )

The Penguin finds out that Batman is destroyed and that's where the real victim is .
He makes an advance on Gotham's toughest cop , Harvey Dent (I like the idea of a world where Harvey is a cop instead of the DA). Batman finds out . Batman is destroyed and his face is an explosion . (I think this means he was crying , next time you talk about someone crying say 'their face was an explosion' )

Batman must stop the Penguin in order to keep his confidence he suspects that the Penguin is an addictive face and has no choice but to ask for more Penguin . (I feel like no one EVER asks for more Penguin)

The Penguin makes things worse by killing Batman . (understatement) He has happened to Batman and he is visible criminal . (very true you look at the Penguin and you know what's up) Batman isn't still around . Batman is in the cloud . (please start using this also as a way to describe death - grandma is in the cloud now little Jimmy) The Penguin finds that he is astounded by killing the man who loves him most . (I should think so) He feels responsible for the death of Gotham's prominent Batman . (as he should) He loves the man that Batman isn't . (whoa , that is DEEP )

Batman learns that he is merely being put on parole which grants Batman the death of his own death . (reincarnation ? ) Batman manages to be himself after being struck down by the Penguin who he loves . (We've all been there right ? )

The Penguin and Batman solve the mystery of their separate ways and travel to the island of rescue with an actor best known as Bruce Wayne . (Batman isn't Bruce Wayne in this universe ? Another stunning twist ! )

Batman learns of a dream society in Europe with all the fabled six months of laughing . (huh ? ) He reluctantly decides to obey his Barbara Batman and stop his medical school in Gotham . (Fantastic , I wonder who the mother is - clearly Batman is just his last name)

The Joke also receives and award for outstanding music and combat .

Things kind of fell apart there at the end (act 3 problems that plague us all) but before that we had a pretty solid tale about Batman and his illicit love for the Penguin .



Someone with a more popular blog should do the Predictive Text Game on said blog - people would get a kick out of that I think .

In other news it seems like the whole "squirting" fad is finally starting to die down . For a while there all anyone wanted to talk about was squirting . Squirt , squirt , squirt , it was annoying . I'm sure it will be replaced with something equally as annoying . People are such followers , wake up sheeple !

What really pissed me off about this whole squirting obsession was that I had a pretty close to 100% success rate at squirting and no one seemed to care . There were all these articles and discussion about how to get squirting to happen during sex and I would say "I can do it easy-peasy" and for some reason not one would ever respond . I mean what's the story ? Someone would post a story about how they finally managed to squirt for the first time after hundreds of tries and people would lose their shit . I've been doing it for decades .

I don't understand . Must be some kind of racial thing .


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40Deuce 46M
5725 posts
5/26/2018 7:16 am

I feel like if you're going to duel it would make more sense to take off your skirt , but I'm not complaining you know ?

Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.


smartasswoman 66F  
35813 posts
5/26/2018 10:36 am

I am jealous, I would love to be RL friends with Ms. Lala.

I love the way lady on the left has her chin proudly lifted, like "I'm a better sword fighter and my tits are nicer too!"


40Deuce replies on 5/28/2018 3:39 pm:
She does have quite a superior look on her face

superbjversion2 68F  
24388 posts
5/27/2018 10:49 am

    Quoting smartasswoman:
    I am jealous, I would love to be RL friends with Ms. Lala.

    I love the way lady on the left has her chin proudly lifted, like "I'm a better sword fighter and my tits are nicer too!"
I saw that same smug look on Lady Left and thought it might've been a Boob Duel (which she obviously won) and the swords were just for show.

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


superbjversion2 68F  
24388 posts
5/27/2018 10:51 am

I am still amazed that you text.

Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!


40Deuce replies on 5/28/2018 3:40 pm:
Well I had to to join the dating world , which I don't really do that anymore but 80's Wrestling Mania isn't going to play itself you know ?

wickedeasy 74F
32404 posts
5/28/2018 11:39 am

do all cellphones do predictive text because I would like to try writing poetry that way.

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


40Deuce replies on 5/28/2018 3:40 pm:
No clue , I'm going to say maybe

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